


Let Him Go

by Pufalup



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Gay Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Keith is trying really hard to be Lance's friend, M/M, More tags to be added, Pining Lance (Voltron), good thing that Lance is too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-19
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-11-21 17:09:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18145040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pufalup/pseuds/Pufalup
Summary: Lance and Keith are fighting way too much, and it's stopping everyone from working as a team. Hunk, Pidge, Shiro, Allura, and Coran put their heads together to figure out a way to make Keith and Lance become friends, but it has some unintended side effects.





	1. Grumpy Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing in this fandom, and honestly, there's so much that you can do with Keith and Lance's relationship! This work should be about six chapters long, including the epilogue, but that's not set in stone. Enjoy!

“Ow!” Lance collides into the invisible wall with a loud crackling noise. It’s the fourth time that that’s happened yet… or is it the fifth? Lance can’t remember. His side still stings from the last time that happened.

“I _said,_ four steps forward, _then_ turn right.” Keith says, boredom practically dripping from his tone.

“I did that!” Lance says.

Keith scoffs. “No, you took _three_ steps forward, and you turned left.”

“Gee, what can I do to make it up to you?” Lance says mockingly. See, _this_ is why he hates working with Keith.

“Well first, you could learn the difference between _right_ and _left._ ”

Pidge pushes his glasses up his nose. He watches the viewing screen with disain. “I don’t think this is going anywhere.”

“Okay, that is _not_ fair. I know the difference between right and left.”

“Oh, so you just get what, _confused?_ ”

“Yes!”

“Coran, why are we doing this?” Shiro says. “They’re just fighting.”

Coran leans his chin in one hand thoughtfully. He’s cheerful as ever. “Well, the point was to prove that they could work together after the fight with the Gladiator, but that does _not_ seem to be happening!”

“You’re an adult! How do you still get confused about right and left?!”

“How do you _not_ get confused? They’re like, the same thing!”

“That’s quite enough,” Allura cuts in. “Coran, disable the maze. Keith, Lance, come with me.”

Everyone shifts on their feet. Hearing Allura this frustrated upsets the team every time.

Of course, training with Keith lands Lance on Allura’s bad side. Perfect.

Lance grumbles. “This is your fault, Keith.”

“How in the universe could this _possibly_ be my fault?” Keith snarls.

“Oh I don’t know, maybe because you keep giving unclear directions and then getting mad when I don’t do it right!”

“Lance, I’ve literally been telling you the number of steps you have to take. _How is that unclear!?_ ”

“Paladins!” Allura snaps. “Can’t you see what you’re doing?”

Keith and Lance stare blankly at Allura, and the urge to fight begins to ebb away from Lance.

“...no?” Lance tries.

Allura hisses at them, full on _hisses_ , and oh boy, Lance does _not_ want to hear that sound again. “Your fighting is keeping everyone from advancing as a team! We cannot _focus_ when you’re acting like children!”

“We’ll do better in the future,” Keith casts his eyes downwards, and suddenly doing just that seems like a _very_ good idea.

“We promise,” Lance says.

Allura nods, still frowning. “See that you do.”

She turns on her heels and marches away, her silver-white hair spilling down around her shoulders.

Keith lets out a sigh of relief. “Glad that’s over with.”

“No kidding. Allura is _scary_ when she yells.”

Keith turns to face him. “I know, right? If she were the queen of _my_ civilization, I wouldn’t take the tiniest step out of place.”

“Something tells me that she’d have your head if you did.” Lance jokes.

Lance laughs, and to his surprise, Keith laughs, too. Keith has a nice laugh. Lance wants to hear it more often.

 

Across the castle, Hunk, Pidge, Shiro, Coran, and Allura are gathered around a screen. Or rather, _were,_ since Allura has gone off glaring at a corner. She didn’t let anyone see the smile on her face.

“ _Something tells me that she’d have your head if you did._ ”

The two laugh, and the sound crackles slightly as it comes through the less-than-amazing speakers.

“ _Well, I guess I’ll see you around._ ” Lance says quietly. The microphone hardly picks it up.

“ _Yeah. It was nice talking to you_.” Keith’s replies.

“ _G’night!_ ” Lance calls, disappearing from the security camera’s field of view.

“ _G’night,_ ” Keith responds, and as he hikes away to his own bedroom, a smile lingers on his lips.

The frame falls still.

“Okay, what just happened?” Hunk says. “One minute they’re fighting, now they’re friends, an’ I don’t really understand.”

“Well, it looks like they’ll just… work it out?” Shiro says, slightly skeptically.

Coran grunts. “Yes, it does look that way.”

Shiro furrows his brow. “It seems too good to be true.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

Allura’s pleasantly accented voice blares in Keith’s room. “Alright, Paladins! Yesterday, you formed Voltron! Time to get up and do it again!”

Keith throws his blanket off and jumps to his feet, his clothes from the day before still on. He slips into the undersuit for his armor, and pulls the rest on piece by piece. He’s sure that the bags under his eyes are as dark as the fiery pits of hell, but whatever.

When he gets to the bridge, he sees that the only other person there is Shiro. Allura and Coran have their faces projected onto a big screen that covers nearly the entire glass wall.

“Aaaand in second arrives Keith! There are still three to go, where are they?” Coran booms.

Keith winces, but says nothing about the volume of the speaker.

A warm hand comes to rest on his shoulder. “Hey,” Shiro says. “You okay?”

Keith nods slightly. “Yeah. Just couldn’t sleep.”

“I think we all feel that.”

A second later, the door bursts open, revealing a disheveled looking Pidge.

“In third comes Pidge! He may be small, but he’s quick!” Coran says. The speakers send out a buzz of static on his last words.

“Coran, what are you doing.” Pidge does not say it like a question.

“We’re going to try something new today! Something _awesome._ ” Coran says animatedly.

“I suppose you’re not gonna tell us what that is.” Pidge says.

“Nope!”

Keith turns at the sound of the doors sliding open again. Hunk stumbles in. “Hey guys! Sorry I’m late, the undersuit just _wouldn’t cooperate._ ”

“Ah, Hunk! You’re here.” Allura greets. “Now where is Lance?”

As if on cue, “Wassup, everybodeh?” Lance calls. Loudly.

“He’s here.” Keith says.

“Come ooon, that’s the only acknowledgement I get? That was a wicked accent!”

Any previous warmth Keith felt towards Lance evaporates. How does Lance get on every single one of his _fucking_ nerves?

No one acknowledges this out loud, either.

“Perfect! Now, Coran and I will be testing out the fighter drones in the Castle, so we’ll use them to monitor your progress as a team.” Allura leaves the front of the frame and takes a seat. A holographic desk comes up, and she begins pressing buttons rapidly.

“Alright! Sounds like fun!” Lance pumps his fist.

“Okay, team.” Shiro begins. “Our goal for today is to learn how to be more in sync with each other, and our Lions. We barely managed to take down the Gladiator, and Zarkon will be ten times worse. We need to fight as one unit.” He makes brief eye contact with Allura, who nods once ever so slightly. “Get to your lions.”

Keith steps into the elevator, which begins to descend quickly. As he flies down the zipline, into the speeder, and begins being carried towards Red’s hangar, he can’t help but think, _is this really necessary?_

As he flies out of the hangar, he gazes out upon the beautiful landscape that makes up Arus. The hills and mountains seem to go on forever, and he’s sure there are a thousand secret spots with magic gracing every leaf and petal.

Too bad he’ll never see any of it.

“Alright, everyone, get in formation. Feel your bond with your Lion. Now close your eyes.”

Keith does.

“Try to see through your Lions eyes, like before. No goals, no purpose, other than getting used to what your Lion feels like.”

He begins to relax. Lets his body mould into the seat. Lets his consciousness widen. Presses on that presence in the back of his brain that he’s come to know as Red, and-

“Oh yeah, me and Blue are soooo good at this exercise.”

Lance’s words cut through his focus like a hot knife through butter. “ _Lance._ ” Keith says, a warning.

Lance doesn’t catch it. “What, _mullet?_ ”

Keith nearly shouts into his helmet. “Could you shut up and take something seriously for once in your life!”

“Oh _please_ , like you’re so high and mighty yourself!”

“Guys, _focus!_ ” Shiro’s authoritative voice stops them as usual. “This isn’t a chance to see who can throw the best insult!”

“Keith started it,” Keith can _see_ Lance pouting in Blue’s cockpit.

“I don’t care who started it.” Shiro says. “Now, connect to the other Paladins. Feel their presence. No secrets, no judgement. Fly _together_.”

Keith sends his mind out to his teammates, and feels their minds. Trickles of thoughts and feelings. He feels Pidge’s thoughts, running a mile a minute on the newest piece of tech he’s found to examine. Hunk’s rumbling belly gets to Keith, too, and all of the sudden nothing in the world sounds better than a plate of nachos. Lance, however, is completely silent.

“Lance.” Shiro says. “You good?”

A beat passes.

“What? Oh, yeah, sorry.”

Keith begins to feel Lance, too. He feels the ghost of sand between his toes, and the rush of ocean water over his skin. The melancholy feeling subsides quickly, and is replaced by thoughts of flight and happiness and laughter. The side that Lance wants to project.

 

Everything runs smoothly from there. Keith and Lance manage to stay off each others’ throats for the most part, and Shiro only has to intervene once more. It’s at dinner when things start to go wrong again.

“How did practice go?” Allura asks, genuinely interested.

Lance leans back in his chair. “It went great. We were on _fire._ ”

Keith smiles. “Literally.”

“Keith, I made one spark! _One spark_!”

“You ran into a rock, it was more than one spark.”

“Well it’s not like you’ve never run into a rock before.”

Keith’s eyes narrow just a fraction. “What’s that supposed to mean?” He says slowly.

Lance’s eyes widen. The response was purely automatic, he hadn’t meant for it to sound so hostile. He just wasn’t used to being vulnerable for Keith, okay? “Well, I just mean, like, you’re not perfect, either.” He winces again. Baaad wording.

“I’m not trying to be perfect, whereas you seem to be out to get me all the time.” Keith knows this is a bad path to go down, he should really just let it _go,_ but it’s so tempting.

“ _I’m_ out to get _you?_ You’ve been at my throat since day _one,_ and you’re telling me that _I’m_ out to get _you?”_

“Oh, _please,_ Lance. How can I _not_ be out to get you? You’re never serious about anything! Everything’s a _joke_ to you, isn’t it? Can’t take one thing seriously, even if it’s the fate of the goddamned universe!”

Shiro’s voice comes out worried. “Guys-”

“That’s it!” Lance slams his hands down on the table with a loud bang that rattles all of the silverware. “Who the _fuck_ do you think you _are?_ Telling me that, what, I’m not good enough?!”

“Well, shit, Lance, maybe you aren’t!” Keith is standing, too, now, and he’s got the same fire in his eyes that’s been _begging_ to be lit all day. “Maybe someone _else_ is meant to pilot the Blue Lion!”

“Wow, you know, that’s really _funny,_ coming from you.” Lance spits. “The Garrison dropout. Aww, poor Keith. Working with actual fucking people was _too hard_ for you! You had to go live _alone,_ in the _desert,_ because no one wanted you. Not _even_ your parents!”

Keith sees red. He barely hears the sound of his chair dropping to the ground, and he barely sees the hallways of the castle fly by as he runs, runs, _runs_ towards his room. The door slides closed behind him, and he falls to his knees in front of his bed. Pulls the covers up towards his face.

A shuddering breath.

_In, out._

Lance didn’t have a right to say that. How could he have the fucking _nerve?_ Lance was only a fighter pilot _because_ Keith left.

_In, out._

Keith shouldn’t have picked on Lance like that. He knew it was a low blow, but Lance wouldn’t stop being cocky for one fucking _second._ He was all about impressing Allura, everyone knows that he’s got a hopeless crush on her. Damnit, _Allura_ probably knows.

_In, out._

The thought of an apology crosses Keith’s mind. No, _he_ shouldn’t have to apologize for _anything._ Lance brought up his parents. That’s inexcusable. Lance should be the one to apologize.

_Maybe he shouldn’t._

\---

In the dining hall, no one speaks.

Lance stands, breathing hard, arms braced on the table top.

A spoon rolls off the table and onto the floor.

Lance runs his hands through his hair. “I’m going to my room.”

He doesn’t look back.

More silence.

Pidge is the first to announce what they’re all thinking. “Okay, so does anyone want to talk about what just happened?”

“If I know Keith,” Shiro looks towards the door. “He’s not going to get over this one so quick.”

“Well, then what do we do? We’ve got two paladins not speaking to each other. We won’t form Voltron this way.” Pidge says.

“Pidge is right.” Allura says. “You will not succeed against Zarkon in this state. We _must_ get Keith and Lance to accept each other.”

“And how do we do that?” Shiro says.

“Hmm. Well, we could start by assigning them to the same practice schedules, eating breaks, and missions. They’ll learn to work together that way.”

“Allura, that’s brilliant!” Pidge says, light in his eyes. “That way, they’ll _have_ to work out any bad conflicts they have, _and_ their friendship will grow stronger for it!”

Allura smiles. “Let’s get to work.”


	2. How To Make Friends 101

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and Keith make up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeesh I already failed to keep to my schedule, oh well. I might update again this week, since I'm on spring break and therefore have less homework. Sidenote: he/him pronouns for Pidge will be switching to she/her pronouns, since the next chapter takes place after she comes out.

Lance glares at the daily schedule posted in the lounge. “Are you kidding me?  _ Again _ ?”

The schedule declares cheerfully,

_ Training from 13th to 16th varga: Lance, Keith _

_ Training from 16th to 19th varga: Hunk, Pidge, Shiro _

He groans.  _ Training with only Keith?  _

Not to be dramatic, but Lance would rather die. 

That’s not exactly true.

Keith can actually be a pretty cool guy. He and Lance have had some pretty good times together, when Keith wasn’t being a total dickwad. Plus, Lance  _ did  _ have eyes, and who’s he to say that Keith isn’t reasonably attractive?

Maybe more than reasonably?

Okay, the guy’s smoking hot, and Lance is only human. But what he  _ used  _ to feel for Keith, he hasn’t felt in a long time.

Not really.

Sort of.

But not really.

“You’ve been staring at the board for five minutes.”

“Pidge! I didn’t see you there.” Lance is startled out of his thoughts. “What’s uuuup?”

Pidge stares blankly at him, his eyes narrowed. “You’ve got that face.”

“What  _ face? _ ”

“Your daydreaming face.”

Lance gawks. “I,” He lays a hand on his chest dramatically. “do not daydream.” 

“Yes, Lance. Yes you do.” 

“Uh, since  _ when,  _ exactly?”

“Since last week. You openly admitted to daydreaming about Allura, remember?” Pidge pops his hip, unimpressed. 

 

Lance snaps his jaw shut, fixing Pidge with a glare. He doesn’t muster any heat into it. “Whatever, Pidge.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Lance turns his attention back to the schedule, pouting. “I don’t want to work with Keith,” he complains.

Pidge comes to stand beside him. “Unfortunately for you, you two appear to have six varags with each other.”

“I can see that.”

“Really? I didn’t know you could read.”

Lance’s pout grows. “Why am I your friend? Why do I put up with this?”

Pidge shrugs. “I dunno. C’mon, Hunk’s making breakfast today and you  _ don’t  _ want to miss it.”

“ _ What?! _ ” Lance exclaims. “Why didn’t anyone  _ tell me? _ ”

“I just did.”

“That doesn’t count and you know it,”

“Says who?”

 

There’s a knock on Keith’s door. “Keith?” Shiro’s voice calls. “You have training in about twenty minutes.”

The words swirl around Keith before he finally processes them. “Oh- uh, I’ll be there in a second.”

Keith’s mysterious dagger balances in his hands. The tourniquet wrapped around the hilt is thrown aside, revealing a hidden symbol. Vibrant purple lines streak across the sloping hilt of the blade, twisting and twirling. Keith has always felt like the blade was calling to him somehow, like it has a message it needs to pass on. 

Staring at it for hours on end might not solve it, but it does pass the time in space. 

One thing that Keith has learned over the past few weeks is that space is completely, utterly, uselessly boring. 

That is, if something  _ isn’t  _ trying to kill you. 

Which is not the best passtime out there. 

So Keith stares at the hilt of his knife. 

And he stares. 

And stares, and stares.

He stares until he has every curve, every streak, every intricate carving burned into the backs of his eyelids. 

And it never solves anything. 

Not the crushing weight of his responsibilities, forced upon him without his consent. 

Not the fact that he’s trapped with six people, one of which seems to be out to get him. 

Not the fact that he feels  _ alone. _

Shiro is there, which certainly helps, but there’s always the suffocating feeling that he’s completely out of place. 

Lance, Hunk, and Pidge have been best friends for years. They grew together, trained together, and lived together long before they even  _ met  _ Keith. 

So when it’s just the four of them in the dining hall, when Shiro skips dinner to strategize with Allura and Coran, Keith idly picks at his food goo while the others laugh and joke. 

Keith is on the outside. 

Shiro knocks again. “I actually need to talk to you about something, can I come in?”

Keith quickly shoves the knife under his pillow as quietly as he possibly can. “Yes,”

Shiro steps into his bare room. He wears a concerned look. “Keith, I think you should apologize to Lance.” He says.

Keith’s thoughts come to a screeching halt, replaced by righteous indignation. “ _ Me _ ? You think  _ I  _ need to apologize to  _ Lance _ ? After what he said?!” 

Shiro sits down on Keith’s bed. He’s not at all defensive or hostile in response to Keith’s outburst, which is an approach developed over the years. “It’s just a suggestion. I think it might help your relationship, that’s all.”

Keith averts his eyes. “I shouldn’t have to apologize.”

“Look at me,” Shiro turns Keith’s head gently. Keith looks up. “Maybe you shouldn’t, but we have a job to do. It’s important that we’re close as a team, right?”

“Right.”

“C’mere.” Shiro leans forward, leaving a soft kiss on Keith’s forehead. It makes Keith feel significantly better. “I know you don’t want to, but it’s for the best.” He whispers.

Keith pulls away after a minute. “Okay,” He says. “I’ll apologize.” 

Shiro smiles fondly at him. “Okay. Now go get dressed, training’s in fifteen minutes.” 

Keith pushes Shiro, who laughs. “Don’t remind me.” Keith can’t help but keep the smile on his face.

 

The doors to the training deck slide open.

Lance looks in upon Keith, bare chested and absolutely  _ ripping  _ up a punching bag. Sweat drips down Keith’s neck and back. His thick hair is plastered to his forehead, and the wraps on his fists barely contrast with his light skin. 

Lance feels a dark blush creeping up his neck. Sweaty Workout Keith should  _ not  _ be as hot as it is. 

“You know, our time for training starts in three minutes.” Lance sasses.

Keith doesn’t slow his assault on the punching bag. “I got here early,” He huffs out.

“Okay, but  _ why? _ ” 

Keith stops. When he turns to look at Lance, there’s something else in his expression. Something shy. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you.”

Lance crosses his arms. “Uh-oh, that can’t be good.”

“Would you please be quiet and  _ let me speak _ ?” Keith says tiredly.

“Fine, staying quiet.” Lance says.

Keith’s eyes drop to the floor. “I guess I wanted to say that I’m sorry, for what I said a few nights ago.”

Lance’s eyebrows raise. He had expected a lot of things, but he has to say that an  _ apology  _ wasn’t even on the list. 

“I wasn’t really thinking about what I was saying, I just blindly said what I thought would hurt most. It wasn’t cool, and I knew I shouldn’t have said it, so, I’m sorry.” Keith says quieter. He’s rambling, and Lance knows it.

Lance considers laughing at him, telling him that he  _ should  _ be sorry, but he knows that he isn’t exactly innocent, either. “I think we both played a part, so I’m sorry, too.” He says before he can stop himself. 

Keith’s gaze snaps up. Lance is acutely aware of how vulnerable he feels right now. 

But of course Keith doesn’t hurt him, he smiles. Small and secret, and just for Lance. It makes his heart hiccup in his chest. “I forgive you.” He says.

Lance smiles, too. “Alright, come here.” He says, opening his arms.

“But I’m all sweaty,” Keith says.

“Dude, I’m about to work out, do you really think I  _ care _ ?”

Keith’s smile grows, and Lance decides he likes to be the reason for that. He wraps his arms around Lance’s waist, pressing their chests together. He looks up at Lance. “Why are you taller than me?” He whispers.

“Maybe you’re not done growing yet,” Lance says.

“Hopefully.” Keith jokes.

Lance hums, and boops Keith right on the nose. “Growing child.” 

“Hey!”

Allura and Shiro sit in silence in the observation platform over the training deck. The lights illuminating the space barely reach them, concealing their forms in the darkness.

“What did you say to him?” Allura whispers.

“Aparentally, the right thing,” Shiro whispers back.

 

Keith lets steaming hot water run over his sore body, easing out the tension but by bit. The workout with Lance had been surprisingly fun, to say the least. Lance had been a hilarious sparring partner. He hadn’t been unfocused for one, and his technique did improve from beginning to end.

_ “I’m gonna kick your ass, Kogane.” Lance says, bringing his guard up. _

_ “You said that last time,” _

_ “Yeah, well, this time I won’t slip.” _

_ “Sure, that was just a slip,” Keith says.  _

_ “What? It was!” _

_ “Whatever you say,” Keith says. “ _ Go _!” _

_ Lance throws a sloppy front kick at Keith, who pushes it aside easily. He lunges in, bringing his fist swiftly up through Lance’s hands and into his chin. He pulls his power. _

_ Lance stumbles backward. “That was extremely rude.” _

_ Keith smirks. “I’m not polite,” He sasses. _

Keith smiles at the memory.

Once out of the shower, Keith wraps a towel around his waist and combs through his tangled hair. To his annoyance, a tooth snaps off, burying itself in a thick knot.

Keith’s irritation doesn’t stick so well, surprisingly. He finds himself letting go in favor of the image of Lances playful smile and teasing laugh. In favor of the way Lance jokingly mocks him that should’ve driven him crazy, and in favor of the warmth in Keith’s chest when Lance’s pride showed through after correctly using a move Keith had taught him.

Keith flops down on his bed, not bothering to change. The soft Altean fabric of the towel slips from his legs and waist, but he doesn’t mind. 

After all, it is  _ his  _ room.

He stares at the ceiling, his exhilaration from training with Lance leaving him with a soft smile.

He’s just barely drifting off when he hears a knock on his door. “Keeeiiiiiiiiith,” Lance whines. “I’m boooored.”

Keith is now  _ very  _ aware that he is lacking any form of clothing at all. “What do you want me to do about that?” He says hesitantly.

There’s a beat of silence outside.

“I don’t know. Just come hang out with me.”

“Why don’t you go hang out with Allura?” 

Lance huffs. “Allura’s  _ busy _ .”

Keith considers his options. He  _ is  _ getting a little bored himself, but he was planning on just sleeping until dinner. “Alright, I’ll come. Let me just get dressed first.”

Lance whoops. “Alright! Let’s go!”

Keith quickly joins him outside, and they make their way down to the common room. 

“So,” Keith starts. “What do you wanna do?”

“I dunno.” Lance says.

Keith hums. “Maybe… we could recreate earth games?”

Lance looks at him like he just invented rocket science. “Keith, that’s an awesome idea!” He exclaims. “Let’s go!”

“Uh, go where?”

“To the storage rooms?” Lance says. “So we can find materials?”  
“There are storage rooms?”

“Yes, there are storage rooms! Haven’t you found them yet?”

“No?”  
“What have you been doing with your free time!?” Lance says incredulously. 

Keith shrugs. “I usually just sleep. It’s what I did in the desert.”

Lance grimaces. “Jeez, you really are boring.”

“Excuse me? I fly a magical robotic space lion and liberate the universe from the evil reign of a maniacal leader who’s been in power for ten thousand years! You might want to redefine ‘boring.’”

Lance stares at him for a second, then huffs out a laugh. “Wow, I think that’s the sassiest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“Clearly I’ve been spending too much time with you, then.”

“That wasn’t a challenge!” Lance cries. He pauses for a second. “Keith, buddy, you’re going the wrong way.”

“Oh, now who’s giving unclear directions?” Keith says, turning to follow Lance down a separate identical corridor. 

“Dude! I said that to you  _ once.” _

“Yes, you did. It hurt very much and I’ll never forget it.”

“Stop being so dramatic, Keith. We’re here.” Lance opens a door at the end of the hallway, and Keith is greeted by the sight of an enormous vault, divided neatly into labeled rows.

“Divide and conquer?” Keith asks, side eyeing Lance.

“Sounds good to me.”

Keith starts down the aisle on the end, his eyes raking over each item quizzically. He mutters to himself while he works down the mostly unrecognisable items. “What the heck is this?” 

The…  _ thing  _ is a cylinder that is slightly curved and tapers off at the end, and probably somewhere between seven and eight inches long. Keith’s fingers slide over it with surprisingly little friction. 

Keith places the object back into its designated bin, shaking his head. Altean items are  _ weird _ .

“Hey Keith! I think I found something!” Lance calls, poking his head out from his aisle.

Keith jogs over to where Lance is standing. “Well? What is it?”

“Do you know how to play Battleship?”

Keith crosses his arms. “Who  _ doesn’t  _ know how to play Battleship?”

“I’d be willing to bet a fair amount of money that Allura and Coran don’t know how to play Battleship.”

“Fair point. How many pieces do you have?”

“Well I’ve found a grid, pegs that fit into it pretty nicely, and some type of sticky stuff.”

“How are we going to make the boats?” Keith asks inspecting Lance’s materials. 

“I don’t know. Maybe we could paint a few of the pegs a different color or something.”

Keith groans. “But then we’d have to find paaaaainnt.”

Lance laughs lightly. “We’re gonna have to find paint anyways, dude.”

“Fine,” Keith grumbles. “I’ll go find paint.”

“Don’t get lost!” Lance calls after him. 

Keith snorts. “I don’t think that’ll be too difficult.”

It’s pretty damn difficult. 

Keith wanders around the isles and in between shelves, trying to memorize his path. He picks up everything that’s ever so slightly brightly colored, but is so far having no luck. 

Keith is inspecting some other can of something he can’t read when he pries a little too hard on the cap. A wave of bright blue goo erupts onto his jacket, coating the sleeve up to his elbow. 

“Are you serious?” He mutters as he tries to wipe some of it off on the can. Unfortunately, it leaves a ghost of blue all up his forearm. “Lance!”

“What?” Lance’s voice sounds far away.  _ How big is this place? _

“I found paint!” 

“How do you know it will stick?”

“It colored my jacket pretty damn well!” 

There’s a pause before Keith hears Lance’s laughter echoing around the room. 

“It’s not funny!” Keith snaps, his ears heating up. He starts to find his way back to Lance, following the sweet sound of his laughter.

Lance snorts. “It’s so funny, are you kidding? What color is the paint?”

“Blue.”

This response brings another bout of laughter from Lance. “Oh my god, Keith! I  _ marked  _ you!”

Keith doesn’t know why that phrasing makes him blush. “It’s just blue paint!”

“Yeah, it’s blue! Blue is my  _ color.” _

Keith rounds the corner, his hands on his hips. “It’s really not funny. This is my only jacket.”

“Oh. You can borrow mine, if you want. I don’t really care about the cold very much.” 

Keith blinks.  _ Wear Lance’s jacket?  _ “Oh, um, okay.”

Lance smiles small. “Okay.” He shrugs off his jacket and hands it to Keith, who puts it on gingerly. The waist of the jacket hangs down by Keith’s mid thigh, and the sleeves fall a significant length past his fingertips. Curse Lance and his longness. 

“Thanks,” he mumbles, Lance’s smell billowing around him. 

“So, is there any paint left or did you spill it all on your jacket?” Lance jokes. 

Keith pretends to check inside of the can, opening it slower this time. The can is almost completely full. “Uh, nope! Looks like it’s all gone.”

“What!?” Lance practically screeches. He snatches the can from Keith and peeks inside. Lance looks up to stare at Keith. “Wow, I can’t believe I fell for that.” 

Keith snickers. “Honestly, me either. That was really bad.” 

“Whatever, Kogane. Let’s just paint the pieces.” He pauses. “You did get brushes… right?”

Keith’s eyes widen. “Fuck.”

“Oh my god.” Lance says, hiding his face in his hands. “You forgot brushes. Now we have to go find those, too. “

“Noooo.” Keith whines. “Let’s just paint with our fingers.” 

“But then my hands would get  _ messy.” _

_ “ _ Oh no.” Keith deadpans. “Not paint on your fingers. That’s so horrible. It’s not like all you have to do is go down to the bathroom to wash it off.” 

“Fine,  _ be that way _ .” Lance says. “Let’s go.”

Keith follows him back to the common room, talking idly. Something about Lance makes him comfortable to be himself. This dynamic feels so natural, Keith can’t believe that he ever fought with Lance. 

Once he recognizes the corridors, he steps up a few paces ahead of Lance. 

A few seconds later, Lance is a few paces ahead of  _ him.  _

Pretty soon, they’re both sprinting down the hallways at full speed, their laughter echoing through the empty castle. 

Keith flies towards the common room with Lance hot on his heels. He grabs for the corner of the door and swings his momentum around the turn, barely slowing down. Coran and Allura look up from where they’re tinkering with some technology in the wall

“Hello Keith! Where’s-“

Lance hurtles straight into Keith from behind. They both go sprawling to the floor, and Lance lands heavily on top of him. The stuff that they were carrying goes skittering across the smooth floor. 

“Lance!” He squeaks, barely sucking in breath. “ _ Lance _ !”

“Oh man, Keith, I’m so sorry.” Lance says, laughing. He rolls off of Keith. 

Keith laughs a little, too. Violet eyes meet blue, and Keith can practically feel the raw emotion in L’s eyes. Lance wears his heart on his sleeve for everyone to see. Keith envies his bravery. 

Someone clears their throat. “Are you alright? What happened?” Allura asks, peering at them from the far wall. 

“We  _ were  _ racing, until Lance just ran straight into me!” Keith says, indignant. 

“It’s not my fault you were standing in the middle of the doorway!” Lance responds, but he’s smiling. His tone lacks any sort of heat, which is new. It makes Keith loose the bite in his words, too. 

“Maybe you should  _ look where you’re going,  _ then!” 

“Yeah, well, you suck.” Lance says. 

Keith snickers. “All out of insults huh? Does that mean I win?” 

Keith lets out a screech as Lance tackles him, struggling to pin him. Keith easily muscles his was out of Lance’s hold, pushing his shoulders back with his feet.

Lance falls backwards onto the floor. His giggles persist. Keith crawls on top of him and pushes Lance’s arms above his head, rendering him immobile. His face is close to Lance. “ _ Now  _ do I win?” He jokes. 

For a beat too long, Lance just stares up at Keith. He blinks, then his cocky smile returns to his face. “Next time, I’ll beat your ass, Keith.”

“That sounds familiar,” Keith says, the hint of a smirk tugging at his lips. 

He releases Lance, rolling awkwardly to the side before standing to collect their scattered materials. 

“Ugh, Lance! Look! The pegs are all over the place!” Keith says, staring at the mess. 

“Do you expect me to help or something?” Lance says, still lying on the floor. Keith throws a peg at him, and it bounces off of his nose. “Hey! What was that for?”

“Suggesting that you wouldn’t help. This  _ is  _ your fault, after all.”

“Shut up,  _ Keith.” _

_ “ _ Shut up,  _ Lance.” _

Lance huffs. “Fine, fine. I’m coming.”

“Good. Otherwise I would’ve left you all alone and gone back to my room.” Keith says, returning to his task.

“You  _ wouldn’t.”  _ Lance gasps, overdramatic as usual.

“Oh I would, too. You’re lucky I’m here at all.”

“You wound me.” Lance laughs. Keith feels a strange pull in his chest when he meets Lance’s eyes again. It feels good, but in a weird way. Almost like it should be unpleasant, but isn’t. Keith shrugs it off.  _ I’ll deal with it later.  _

  
  


“ _ Say it,  _ Keith.” Lance leans over the table, his competitive grin shining.

Keith narrows his eyes at Lance. “You sank my battleship.”

“Yes!” Lance pumps a fist in the air, jumping up from his seat. “I  _ win!! _ ” Keith crosses his arms and pouts. “C’mon, Keith! Have some sportsmanship.” Lance chides lightly.

“You suck,” He grumbles, trying desperately to push the corners of his mouth down.

Lance bends down in front of Keith and pokes his forming smile. “I see that smiiiiile,” 

He laughs harder when Keith launches a ‘battleship’ at him, which is really just some duct tape (provided by Allura) wrapped around three pegs.

Lance retaliates by throwing one of his own ‘battleships’ back. It bounces off of Keith’s ridiculously poofy hair and clatters to the floor.

When Hunk, Pidge, and Shiro finish training, they find Lance and Keith, lying on the floor, surrounded by board game pieces, laughing at apparently nothing.

Shiro hasn’t seen Keith look so happy in… He doesn’t know how long. He smiles to himself, proud of the progress that Keith has made.

 

For once, when Keith’s head hits the pillow, the depths of his mind relax into deep blues and purples instead of whirring on for hours. Sleep comes easily, washing over his tired body. 

Keith wouldn’t mind going to sleep like this every night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter we'll go back to angsty stuff with the smol beans. Please let me know if there are any typos! I'm not so great at finding them :3


	3. Lance Stop Falling For Your Friends That's Not Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance comes to terms with his feelings about Keith, and Keith... hasn't. Lance finds out more about Keith's life, and it turns out that they have more in common than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaand I doubled the word count. Oops. I might end up needing a seventh chapter, since this one didn't exactly hit all the points I needed for the story. Either that, or they'll just keep getting longer :)
> 
> WARNING: Graphic self-harm in this chapter past the second line break. It ends at the third, if you need to skip ahead. Stay safe!

Lance sits on the corner of his bed, unable to keep a dopey smile off of his face. When he closes his eyes, the image of Keith’s dazzling smile shines in his mind. Before that morning, Keith hardly ever smiled at him and Lance had _still_ been drawn to him, but _now?_

Now Lance is positively enthralled. He knows what it’s like to be able to make Keith laugh. He knows that Keith likes board games, that Keith is clumsy, that Keith is kind, that Keith is funny. He knows what being friends with Keith is like.

And he’s determined to not to screw it up.

Lance settles into his familiar skin care routine, leafing through the various Altean bottles in search of the one he wants.

He pours the clear liquid out onto a blue washcloth by his sink, making sure to water down the mixture so that it doesn’t burn his face like the first time.

As he swipes the damp washcloth over his face, he finds himself thinking back to the storage room. He replays the memory in his head, seeing Keith with his entire left arm covered up to the sleeve in blue. Seeing Keith burrow into Lance’s warm jacket, the hood almost covering his eyes. Keith’s shy smile and thanks, even though his fingers didn’t reach past the end of the sleeves. Keith’s-

Oh no.

No.

No no no no no.

_No._

_I like Keith._

Lance groans at the thought, squeezing his eyes shut.

All it took was _one_ evening hanging out together, and his crush is flooding back to haunt him as if it were a kitten and he a mouse.

It’s infuriating.

All he wanted was a friendship with Keith; he already accepted that Keith is out of his league. But _no_ , these _stupid_ feelings had to come back, and now he’s pining for a relationship that won’t ever happen.

_Fuck._

 

* * *

 

 

Keith can feel the blade calling him all the way across the castle. He tries to ignore it, to punch the wriggling in his gut away with the punching bag. He tries, he really does, but the pull of the blade eventually drags him to his room.

He takes the knife out from under his pillow, watching how the dark metal of the blade catches the light maliciously.

It wants blood.

Keith can feel it. The itch under his skin, pulling, _calling_ to be let out. He rolls up his sleeve, where old scars etch across his skin.

He brings the knife down across his wrist, the metal cutting smoothly across his flesh. He relishes in the sting, in the pain. It feels good in a twisted sort of way.

It’s gone before he’s ready. The knife lifts off his wrist and blood oozes out of it’s trail.

So he doesn’t stop.

He drags it again and again and more and more trickles of blood join the first, dripping off of his elbow into a puddle on the floor.

_Again._

His wrist hurts so much, but it’s so _good._ He can’t stop.

_Again._

He takes a shaking breath. He should stop.

_Again._

His whole forearm is almost entirely covered. The puddle on the floor grows.

_Again._

The pain isn’t enough. He needs more.

_Again._

Blood coats the point of the knife, shimmering before disappearing. The blade hums in his hand, if telling him _again._

Then the vibrating stops. The blade glows briefly, before falling limp in his hand.

Keith stares at the mess he’s made. All of the sudden, the pain is too much. Too much but not enough.

Keith hates himself. _Why do I do this? Why can’t I just let people in?_ He thinks miserably.

Forcing his tears back, Keith takes the rag in his bathroom and slowly wipes the blood away. He hisses when he accidentally rubs the rough material over one of his cuts, causing it to sting. The new type of pain feels good but terrible at the same time.

A lot like so much in Keith’s life.

His mind is blank as he cleans up his mess, swiping the rag automatically across the smooth material.

_Why can’t I just let people in?_

  


* * *

  


When they touch down on the moon, Lance is the first to get off the ship. He won’t let anyone know, but he’s actually excited for this mission. It makes him feel needed, and he hasn’t exactly had much of that in his life.

Meeting Nyma had just been a bonus. A distraction. Something that doesn’t matter. Someone he can chase after that would be willing to look back at him.

He knew he shouldn’t have taken her into Blue. He _knew_ it. But the thought of Nyma and Keith flying together was just… wrong.

Now he’s chained to a fucking tree, with Keith in his ear. “What that? I, uh… you’re cutting out. I can’t… I can’t hear you.”

“Oh come on! I thought we bonded!” Lance shouts. No one says anything over the comms. “Keith? My buddy? My man?”

Finally, Shiro responds. “Lance, send us your location. We’ll be there in a minute.”

Lance breathes out a sigh of relief, wiggling around in his handcuffs. “Thank god. I’ve been lying on the ground like this for like, hours.”

“Stop being so overdramatic, Lance.” Pidge lands the Green Lion lands by the tree, kicking up dust and grass into Lance’s face.

Lance spits out a few blades of uprooted grass. “First of all, rude! Did you really have to land right there?”

Pidge steps out of Green’s mouth, her helmet tucked under the crook of her elbow. “What’s that? I can’t hear you. You’re cutting out.” She mocks.

Lance scoffs, feeling his face heat up. He hopes that the blue and purple sky masks the color.

“Lance, are you blushing?” Pidge asks incredulously. She crouches down in front of him, squinting. “Do you _like_ Keith?”

Lance’s eyes widen. _How did she figure it out so_ quick _?_ “No! No no no, me? Like _Keith_?” He laughs nervously. “No.”

“Oh my god. You like Keith.” Pidge whispers, her eyes widening.

“I just said I don’t!”

“Don’t what?”

Lance looks as far over his shoulder as he can. “Really, Keith? ‘You’re cutting out’? Was that necessary?”

“No,” Keith says. He draws his bayard. “But it was funny.”

“You? Funny? Never heard of it.” Lance says sarcastically.

Keith brings his bayard swiftly down onto the ties and the blade slices through the yellow cording as if it were butter.

Lance stands, shaking out his limbs. “Thanks! Now, where’s Blue?”

Keith jabs a thumb over his shoulder. “She’s in the ship, dummy. You’ll have to ride with me to get there.”

“Oh no, the torture.” Lance says. He can feel Pidge’s gaze boring into the back of his skull as he follows Keith to Red, as if she’s mocking him.

Keith stops before Red’s boarding ramp and holds out a hand. “M’lady,” He says in a ridiculous english accent.

Lance giggles, impersonating a flirtatious noblewomen the best he can. “You are so sweet,” He says, taking the offered hand.

As soon as he steps into Red, he can feel her in the back of his mind, reaching out to him questioningly. Lance reaches back in the same way he would with Blue, opening his mind to the speculation.

He feels Red’s purr of satisfaction vibrate through his bones, and he smiles. “So, what happened with you guys? It sounded pretty crazy through the comms.” Lance leans against Keith’s chair as Red takes off.

“It was pretty crazy.” Keith says, obviously excited about the successful mission. “Rolo and Nyma tried to run off with Blue, and we managed to catch up with them. Whoever was piloting went through this crazy asteroid belt, and-”

“And let me guess, you were the only one who could make it through?” Lance says.

“Yeah.” Keith says, smiling.

“Of course you were.” Lance says softly, gazing out at the landscape passing outside of Red. Keith doesn’t push it.

 

* * *

 

“And the stars were so bright- Shay is so beautiful, Lance! She’s so amazing, I wish we could take her with us. Is there a way we can keep in contact? Can we like, give her a thing so I can still talk to her? Would Allura let us?” Hunk rambles into Lance’s ear.

Lance laughs quietly. “Relax, Hunk. You’ll see her again, after all of this is over.”

“But what if I don’t? What if we lose, and I never see her again??”

“Hunk, if it’s meant to be, it’ll be. We’ve already left the Balmera.”

“This sounds like a serious crush, Hunk.” Pidge comments. The roar of Green landing is audible through the comms. “Are you _sure_ she’s not your girlfriend?”

Hunk sputters at Pidge. “No! No, she’s not my girlfriend. Do Balmerans even have girlfriends or boyfriends? What if they mate for life!?”

“Then you’ve already found your life partner,” Lance teases. Blue touches down smoothly in her hangar, her claws merging seamlessly into place. Lance’s chair slides backwards and down a little ways before Blue opens her jaws and extends the boarding ramp for Lance, who saunters down it. He bids her goodbye with a mock salute.

Hunk makes a bunch of incoherent sounds that all seem indignant, and Lance and Pidge laugh. “This is not funny, guys!” He squawks.

“Oh, we’re not letting this go anytime soon.” Lance says. When he pulls off his helmet, the room air seems a little colder than normal. He shrugs it off, assuming it’s because of his sweat-soaked skin.

“Paladins, report to the bridge for debrief.” Allura says, her voice ringing out clearly over the comms installed in Blue’s hangar.

Lance groans inwardly. He was _really_ looking forward to just relaxing for a while, maybe hanging out with his teammates if he had the energy.

_Debrief first, then playtime._ Lance assures himself, changing course to the bridge.

“Great, you’re here!” Allura calls cheerily.

Lance spreads his most flirtatious grin. “You excited to see me, Princess?” He winks.

Allura rolls her eyes. “We can start now, that’s why I’m happy.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Lance says, plopping down on his chair. “I don’t have a chance with you anyway.”

Lance doesn’t see it, but Keith blinks, taken aback by Lance’s acceptance of his one-sided crush. _Is he feeling okay?_

Allura starts the debrief smoothly. “As you all know, The ship took a terrible beating during the fight. The spectral generator is offline, a fire started in VIN bay three, the suppressors are almost completely destroyed, and who knows what else.”

Shiro stands next to her. “Alright, team. Hunk, take Pidge to fix the suppressors, we’ll need them to wormhole. Coran will fix VIN bay three and get it up and running. Keith, work your way with Lance across the castle to find any other damage, and report back to me or Allura.” He pauses. “Get to work.”

The team disperses, everyone bustling to get down the right passageway. Keith and Lance amble down a path, talking easily.

“Allura! Shiro!” Pidge calls, jogging up to them. Hunk is on her heels.

“Yes, Pidge? What is it?” Allura asks.

“I found something out while I was talking with Lance.” She says, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“What did you find out?” Shiro asks, measured curiosity in his tone.

“Lance has a crush on Keith.”

Silence envelopes the room, thick and heavy. For a moment, they can only stare at Pidge, trying to wrap their minds around what she just said.

“Lance has a _what_ on Keith?” Shiro says, his eyes widening.

“How? _Why_?” Hunk chimes in, looking just as baffled.

“I.. don’t know. I didn’t really get a chance to talk to him about it.” Pidge says.

Hunk runs his fingers through his hair. “Oh my god, this is because we’ve been making them spend time together, isn’t it?”

Pidge nods. “That’s what I was thinking, yes.” She says.

“Oooooh this is bad, this is bad.” Hunk whines.

“I don’t think it is,” Allura cuts in. “What if this is the perfect way for them to bond? What if this is how they will work together?”

Shiro purses his lips, looking thoughtful. “So you’re saying that we should _encourage_ Lance?” He says skeptically.

A slow smile spreads across Pidge’s face. “It’s brilliant! We won’t stop what we’re doing, and maybe they’ll get together and the team will work! That is, if Keith likes Lance back.”

“I’ll ask him.” Shiro says. “He’ll tell me the truth. We should get going on repairs. Update in two days.”

“‘Right. Later, team leader.” Pidge says, bouncing out of the room like a giddy child. Hunk follows after her.

The doors slide shut. “I don’t have a good feeling about this.” Shiro mutters.

“Me either.” Allura says. “Something tells me that this will go horribly wrong.”

 

* * *

 

“Whatever-this-room-is, check.” Lance says. He makes a move to walk out of the door, but Keith catches his shirt

“Woah, whoah, whoah, slow down. We haven’t checked around yet.” Keith says.

“But it’s boooring.” Lance whines. “And my feet hurt.” He’s so done with this task, he just wants to go hang out in his room.

“Lance, we’re almost done.” Keith says. “Just a few more.”

“Well, there’s probably nothing broken in it, so we can just go-”

“Nuh-uh.” Keith scolds. “Would you rather be in a working ship and do work or in a broken ship that explodes in space?”

Lance narrows his eyes. “See, I understand that it needs to be done, I just don’t want to do it.”

Keith laughs lightly. “You’ve got me there,” He says playfully.

Lance’s stupid heart stumbles in his chest at the sound. He struggles to regain his composure. He shuffles around the room, looking around at the foreign objects. The air is filled with the hum of machinery.

Every now and then, he’ll sneak a glance at Keith, taking in his adorable focused pout. Once, he stares for a beat too long and Keith’s eyes snap up to meet his. He hides his face in a cabinet in the ground, pretending to check the wires while mainly just trying to hide his blush that deepens by the second.

He pushes one aside just for show, and sees that there are charred wires running up a tube. “Hey Keith, do you think this is broken?”

Keith looks over his shoulder. _Don’t focus on his breath on your neck, don’t focus on his breath on your neck, don’t focus on his breath on your neck._ “Yeah, that looks pretty bad. We should tell Shiro.”

“Okay.” Lance says. He pulls out his not-walkie-talkie. “This is Lance, come in.”

“Lance. How is everything?” Shiro responds.

“Fine until now, we just found damage in this room. Do you have our location?” Keith says.

“I just pinned you down. Allura just got called to help with the suppressors, but I’ll put it on her list.”

“Roger that.” Lance says.

Keith stands. “Two more to go.” He holds out a hand for Lance.

Lance takes the offered hand. The skin-on-skin contact makes his stomach squirm, so he stands, letting go quickly.

He misses the contact as soon as it’s gone.

 

* * *

 

 

When Keith steps out of the shower rooms, he feels as though winter has stormed the castle. It’s absolutely _freezing._ The castle is already powered down for the night, and the lights along the path to Keith’s room are dimmed.

As soon as he opens the door, he wraps the blanket around his shoulders, shivering. He pulls on his clothes shakily, not letting the blanket down. He curls up on his mattress, settling in for a cold night when he notices Lance’s jacket still sits on his desk, next to his own stained one. _Lance must be freezing._

Holding the blanket up with one hand, Keith grabs Lance’s jacket and heads for the door. He almost walks into Lance while coming out of his room.

“Oh, hey Keith.” Lance says. He looks absolutely adorable, his hair ruffled and messy. Soft Altean pajamas stretch across his bony chest, framing him nicely.

“Hey.” Keith says. He shoves the jacket towards Lance. “Here. You forgot to take it back.”

“Oh.” Lance says. He runs a hand through his hair nervously. “Actually, I was going to ask if I could sleep in your room tonight. Allura says the main heater was the thing we found, and it was totally fried, so it’s gonna be a really cold night to spend alone.”

“Okay, come in.” Keith says. “Don’t want you freezing to death.” He jokes, stepping out of the doorway.

Just like that, the tension breaks. Lance pushes into his room and sits down on the edge of Keith’s bed. He pulls the blanket tighter around himself. “What makes you think you won’t freeze to death?”

“Red can spray lava on me.”

Lance huffs out a laugh. “I don’t think you’d survive that, either.”

“We might have to do an experiment, just to see.” Keith says. He drops his blanket around Lance. “Here.”

“Keep it, I’m okay.” Lance says, huddling in on himself. Keith gives him a stern look, and Lance caves after a moment, accepting the offered blanket. “Woah, wait, where are your pajamas?”

“I sleep in my clothes,” Keith crosses his arms.

“Nope! Unacceptable. I will not sleep with you in your day-clothes. Go put on pajamas.” Lance says.

“I don’t even know where you _got_ those.”

Lance stares at him. “Keith, my man. Have you not found the closet?”

“...No?”

“What?!” Lance jumps up. “It’s got all kinds of cool stuff in it! It has Altean formal dress, it has swimsuits, and the softest pajamas ever. Do you hear me? The _softest._ ” He places his hand onto a seemingly random metal plate on the wall. To Keith’s surprise, it lights up and scans his hand quickly.

A section of the wall slides back, revealing an entire _walk in closet_. There are tank tops, shorts, tee shirts, shoes, jackets, suits, you name it. “Woah,” Keith breathes, swiping a hand across the rows of hanging attire. Every single thing has accents of red and gold laced delicately across the fabric. “How did you find this?”

“I was really, really bored.” Lance jokes. “Hey, all of my stuff is blue. That’s so cool, we have like, color matched outfits!” Lance says. He pulls out a huge blanket from a random compartment. It’s ridiculously fluffy, patterned with black and a deep maroon. “Why do you get a blanket? I want a blanket!”

“I dunno. Maybe I’m just better.” Keith says. He doesn’t miss the huff Lance makes in response. Keith turns away and yanks his shirt over his head, pulling the pajamas on in its place. A light rose color tints the fabric, with deeper reds highlighting the collar and sleeves. They fit loosely across his frame.

Lance feels like he’s choking on his own spit. Keith’s lean muscle ripples under his bare skin, and Lance has way too many images going through his head right now.

It’s official, Lance just got level 999 Friendzoned.

He barely calms his expression to something normal before Keith turns back around to face him.

“See? Softest pajamas _ever_ , right?” Lance says. The now three blankets almost completely hide his form. His hair is messy and his eyes are bright. He’s somehow even more adorable than he was before.

Keith brings the cuff of his sleeve over his face. “Yeah, they’re pretty great. Let’s go to bed, I’m drained.”

“‘Mkay.” Lance says. He plops down, bouncing on the mattress.

Keith slips under the blankets tightly bundled around Lance, trying in vain to calm his stuttering heartbeat. Immediately, long limbs tangle around his own. Lance snuggles up firmly to his side and tucks his nose into the crook of Keith’s neck. Keith can feel every breath he takes, the air tickling across sensitive skin.

Lance drapes an arm across Keith’s stomach, his fingers brushing Keith’s far wrist, ghosting across-

_Oh no._

“Keith?” Lance’s fingers wrap around Keith’s wrist, pulling it upwards. The long, dark scabs stand out in stark contrast to his pale skin. “What’s this?”

Keith pulls his hand back. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry.”

Lance looks up at him through his long eyelashes. “Are you- are you hurting yourself?” He asks softly.

“I said it’s nothing.” Keith says. He looks away from Lance’s worried eyes. _Stupid._

_Stupid. Stupid, stupid._

“No, Keith,” Lance shifts his position so that he’s lying in between Keith’s legs. He folds his arms over Keith’s chest. Keith’s breath catches in his throat uncomfortably, his pulse quickening again. Lance’s face is mere inches from his own. “It’s not nothing. I used to hurt myself, too.” Lance says. He turns his own wrist up, letting pale scars catch the dim light. “Back at the Garrison. Hunk and Pidge found out, and they both freaked out. They cared so much, Keith. Please, _please_ don’t hurt yourself anymore.” Lance’s voice is getting frantic and a tear tracks shine clear on his cheeks. “Please.” He whimpers.

Keith closes his eyes around his tears, but they slip out anyway. Rolling down his cheeks and dripping off of his chin. Lance reaches up, bringing soft fingers to wipe them away. The air around them is still, the quiet hum of the ship’s engine dissolving into nothing.

Keith doesn’t say anything. He can’t say anything around the lump in his throat. Lance wraps his arms around Keith’s neck, pulling him close. Holding him. Keith’s own arms find their way around Lance, too.

For a while, Lance just holds him. He doesn’t expect anything from Keith. He just holds Keith while he cries.

Lance feels unbelievably safe.

It’s nice, feeling that from someone. It’s nice, feeling like someone _cares_ as much as Lance does. Before, he hadn’t known this side of Lance. The side that loves. The side that protects. The side that has so much emotion for a man he’s hated and fought for years.

Keith can hear Lance’s breathing, steady and calming. It billows out in the frigid air, furling out around his face and mingling with Keith’s.

Lance pulls the blankets higher over them, covering their heads. All light is blocked from Keith’s eyes, even from his bright desk.

For whatever reason, Lance is trying to get into Keith’s life. He’s banging on the walls that stand tall in his path. He’s digging under them, worming his way closer to Keith.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so hard to just let him in.

 

* * *

 

When Lance wakes, he finds himself wrapped snugly around a warm body. _Keith’s_ warm body.

All of a sudden, Lance is _very_ awake.

His heart is thundering so loudly, he’s sure Keith can feel it.

“‘Morning,” Keith mumbles sleepily. The lights of the castle shine through the red blanket, casting a warm glow across Keith’s face.

Keith’s morning should completely, utterly, absolutely _not_ be as hot as it is. His hair is sticking up in funny directions and falling into his soft eyes, bleary from sleep.

He looks so peaceful, so _human,_ and Lance can’t deal with it. He’s having a cuteness overload. Can a man die of being exposed to too much cute?

“Sorry,” Lance says quickly. “Did I wake you?”

Keith shakes his head. “Nah, I’ve been awake for a while. Time to get up?”

Lance nods. He throws his arm out, flailing it around and trying to find the corner of the blanket.

Keith laughs as he reaches up. Lance feels something smoothing his no doubt unruly hair, and it registers after a moment that _that’s Keith’s hand_. He freezes, eyes widening.

“Oh, uh, sorry- I don’t know why I did that.” Keith says, drawing his hand back.

“No, it’s okay. I like it when people touch my hair.” Lance responds. Keith’s eyes lock onto his, staying there a moment too long.

“Okay.” He says. His hand finds its way back to Lance’s head. Lance feels dull fingernails scratching on his scalp, and practically melts into the contact. He makes a low moan in the back of his throat that _really_ wasn’t supposed to come out.

Keith smiles softly at him. “Wow, you really _do_ like this.” He comments.

Lance pouts, not opening his eyes. “Stop making fun of me and just keep doing _that_.”

Keith is glad that Lance’s eyes are closed, otherwise he would easily spot the growing patches of red high on his cheeks.

Lance looks like he’s in heaven. His mouth falls open in a little ‘o’ and a contented smile tugs on his lips.

Lance is, to put it simply, completely gorgeous.

Lance lets his thoughts wander away from him, only focusing on Keith’s hand in his hair. He’s dimly aware that a second has joined the first, and he sighs into the new pleasure.

Time trickles away from him as he lets the world melt into darkness, save for the ten dull points of contact on his scalp.

He’s almost drifting off again when he hears Keith chuckle. “I’m losing you already?” He jokes. The fingers in his hair pull back.

Lance groans. “Why’d you stop?” He whines.

“It’s time to get up.” Keith says. “Don’t you have a skin routine to do or something?”

“Shit, yeah.” Lance curses. He throws the covers off, and a blast of freezing air engulfs his contentedly warm skin.

“Ooooh my god it’s cold.” Keith says.

“Yeah, no kidding. Look.” Lance says. A thin layer of frost has settled on everything, coating all of Keith’s stuff.

“I call not getting shoes from my closet.” Keith says.

“Excuse me, is that any way to treat your guest?” Lance mutters, sitting up. Keith yanks the blankets off of him, leaving Lance cold and exposed. “Hey!”

“What?” Keith says innocently. The blankets cover his entire body up to his nose, which he has nuzzled into the thick fluff. “You’re getting up anyway.”

Lance draws his lips back in a grin. “Not anymore.” He falls down on top of Keith, wrapping his arms around Keith’s neck.

“Get off me!” Keith howls, but Lance can hear the smile in his voice.

“Not gonna happen, Mullet.” Lance mumbles into the cold fabric across Keith’s shoulder.

“Lance!” Keith says. He kicks out, his toes catching on the hem of Lance’s shirt.

The blow sends Lance toppling to the floor with Keith right behind him. Lance lands heavily on the frozen but quickly warming metal of the ship.

The air is knocked out of his lungs again when Keith falls directly on top of him, the blankets still draped around his waist.

“Keith!” Lance heaves overdramatically. Keith’s laughs only grow with that, and it’s not doing anything good to Lance’s insides.

When Lance looks up, he really, _really_ wishes he hadn’t. There’s barely any distance between his face and Keith’s and they breathe the same air, morning breath and all.

From this close, Lance can see that there are deep purple streaks accenting Keith’s already unfairly pretty eyes. Keith is holding his gaze, his smile turning to something… almost _shy._

Shy is a good look for Keith, Lance decides. The way he looks up at Lance through his eyelashes is incredibly attractive and alluring, and the way he chews his lip nervously is all kinds of cute.

With a start, Lance realizes that all he has to do is tilt his chin up slightly, and his lips would be on Keith’s.

Agonizingly slowly, Lance reaches up, one hand coming across the back of his neck and the other the side of his head. Lance’s fingers rest across Keith’s sharp jawline and his thumbs against his cheekbones. The fingers on his other hand disappear in Keith’s raven hair, soft as silk against his pads.

He’s sure that a dark blush is settling across his features, and there’s no doubt it’s completely obvious to Keith.

What surprises Lance the most is the fact that _Keith isn’t pulling away._ He’s letting Lance touch him like this. He’s letting Lance hold his head in his hands.

Lance swallows hard. He starts to lean upwards, but he chickens out at the last second. “I have a skincare routine to get to, Keith.” He says.

For a split second, Keith looks crestfallen. Lance almost thinks he imagined it, since the playful nature of Keith’s eyes is back again. “You’re skin is already flawless.” He teases, dragging calloused finger down Lance’s smooth features.

That kind of touching does _things_ to Lance’s heart and stomach. The finger is gone before he’s ready. “I assure you, if I miss this one, it won’t be.”

“Whatever you say,” Keith says. He rolls off of Lance, taking the warmth of the comforters with him.

Lance fights the urge to whine at the loss of contact. He pushes himself up on his elbows, moving to tug his now wet sleep shirt over his head. “Fuck, I don’t have any clothes with me.”

Keith pulls on a red form-fitting long sleeved shirt, throwing his pajama shirt in a gaping hole he hopes is a hamper. He turns and throws a red shirt and a pair of what Lance assumes are black pants at him. He catches them with ease. “Wear these, then.” Keith says.

Lance stares down at the pile of clothing in his hands, feeling a blush creep up his neck. He quickly slips the soft Altean fabric over his head, and to his disappointment, the shirt does not smell like Keith.

_Don’t be stupid,_ he thinks. _He didn’t even know about the closet until last night. There’s no_ way _it would smell like him._

Lance reaches towards the shoe rack and selects a pair that seem sort of like Converse sneakers. The inside is lined with something soft that seems like a sock, so Lance just puts his bare foot in it.

The shoe seems to mould to his foot, supporting him in all the right ways. “Woah, Keith, check out these magic shoes,” He says.

Keith looks skeptical. “Lance, those are just sneakers.”

“Magic sneakers!” Lance insists. “They fit your feet perfectly!”

“I’m sure they do.” Keith says. He turns back to the shelves and racks, picking out a winter jacket to put wear.

“Thanks for the good night’s sleep,” Lance says lightly. He pauses, then continues on cautiously, “If you need me, I’m here. Remember that.”

Judging from the cute smile on Keith’s lips, he doesn’t think that what Lance said was creepy.

The door slides shut behind him. Lance breathes out a long sigh.

So that just happened. Lance had almost kissed Keith, and he hadn’t tried to stop him. Lance… doesn’t know what to make of that.

He jogs towards his room across the castle, following the familiar path.

The Altean clothing holds heat surprisingly well, and probably better than it should. The entire interior castle is coated with a thick layer of frost, and Lance doesn’t feel a thing.

The door to his room slides open, and he finds that his tablets are also covered. So is his bed.

And his chair.

And his ring.

Lance hurries over to it, lifting the chain up. The silver of the ring looks almost blue in the castle’s lights. To Lance’s unease, the sea water inside it is frozen almost completely solid, save for a small pocket of liquid near the center.

He slips it off of the chain and onto his finger, where it fills a spot Lance didn’t know was empty. The ring is a reassurance, a little reminder of home and Varadero Beach. It feels nice to carry a part of that with him.

Settling into his skin care routine is a kind of relief from the past few hours. Learning that Keith hurts himself was definitely the worst part. All these years, Keith had just seemed broody, but Lance never thought him as the type to cut himself.

_Maybe I should’ve._ Lance thinks to himself as he dampens the round sponge-like thing that seems like a reusable cotton pad of sorts. Keith had always seemed too confident in himself. He always let off the cool broody boy vibe, and Lance just didn’t consider it.

Now that he knows, it all seems to fall into place. Keith wasn’t trying to have no friends, he was socially awkward. Keith wasn’t trying to be mean to everyone, he was mentally ill. Keith isn’t trying to be cool, he’s depressed.

Thinking of Keith, in his room, holding a knife across his wrist makes Lance want to break down and cry. At the time, he hadn’t understood why Pidge and Hunk were so adamant about their feelings, and now he realizes that they weren’t trying. They weren’t dramatizing, that’s just how they felt.

Lance wrings out the sponge under the tap water, feeling uneasy. He can’t stomach the thought of Keith hurting himself again.

 

* * *

 

Keith slowly slides to the floor from the wall. _What just happened?_ He thinks, replaying the memory over and over in his head. Lance had been so close, _so close_ to kissing him, and even worse, Keith thought he would. He'd  _expected_ it.

Keith groans, shoving the heels of his palms into his eyes. Of course Lance doesn’t think of him like that. Why would he, now that he sees how broken Keith is? Who _would_ want him?

But Lance had been so kind to him. He’d held Keith’s hand and _begged_ him to stop hurting himself. He’d cried for Keith, showing him stronger emotion than Keith thought possible from anyone.

Keith had never been a very emotional person. Ever since his mother left him and his dad, he’d been closed off and angry. He didn’t show vulnerability.

What Lance had shown him could only be described as complete vulnerability. It was so raw, so open, and it took Keith’s breath away. He couldn’t understand why Lance cared so much about him.

He takes a deep breath, collecting himself.

He needs to tell someone about this.

 

* * *

 

When Keith walks into the bridge, he sees that his teammates are all in Altean winter dress. Apparently, he _was_ the only one who didn’t know about the closets.

Huh.

Allura looks dashing in a fluffy winter coat that extends down to her knees. “As I’m sure you’ve noticed, the castle is… not functioning correctly. We’ll have to dock the ship if we’re to fix it without, to put it simply, freezing to death.”

“Luckily for us,” Coran pipes up from his control dest. “Planet Aizus, an old ally of Altea, is right near us, and it does not appear to have been taken by the Galra! My grandfather had the help of the Aizuan people to build this very ship, so they could help us now!”

“I sent a distress signal to them and they have responded positively, granting us permission to stay on their planet for as long as we need.” Allura says. “They will provide accommodations for our stay, as well as three meals a day. Our course has us there in roughly half a varga.”

“Great! The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get out of this cold.” Lance says, relieved.

“Fortunately for you, number four, the planet is mostly tropical!” Coran chirps. “In a remarkable case, it also has a habitable moon that is completely covered by ice! Isn’t that fun?”

“Alright everyone, get back to your rooms and pack up the stuff you’ll need for your stay.” Shiro says. He smiles. “We’re getting a break.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will start with unpacking on Aizus, then we'll get to keith's confession! :D

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to try to update every one to two weeks, but I'm also aware of how that turned out last time, so the update schedule might get a bit wonky.


End file.
